antiGUY gives his top 5 list of music stuff. Could be songs, people, a stupid trend... nothing is sacred to antiGUY

This Months Top 5

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Before we begin, I am an old-school metalhead. I love the classic metal style of groups like Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, Ozzy, Sabbath, Iced Earth, Dio�the list goes on. But I will state for the record that I also happen to like a lot of the so called "mall-core" groups, especially the early adopters of this style (ok the rap-rock stuff I don't like and never will) but now it seems that the record companies are flooding the market with new "nu-metal" groups that bring nothing new to the table and simply rip-off those that came before, this is the first indication that all is not well with the mall-core scene. Some of the mall-core groups will go on to have long carriers, (no one thought Poison would be out playing arenas still, but they are) but fortunately the vast majority of cheap copycats will fall by the wayside and become at most punch lines to jokes or you will see them on future episodes of VH1's "Where Are They Now" when the next trend comes along and takes the place of "mall-core".

What is "Mall-Core"? Some people have coined the term "Mall-Core" to describe the immergence of what is also considered "nu-metal". It appears that the derogatory "Mall-Core" designation is in fact a mocking of the fact that young suburban teens are attracted to this form of music and is making reference to such teens being seen at shopping malls wearing t-shirts for the bands that play this type of music.

While I keep an open mind about most music, I tend to judge the band on their merits not what style of music they play, as of late it appears that the record companies have gone overboard and have over-saturated the market with mediocre "mall-core" groups in order to cash in on the trend. This is not a new phenomenon; I discussed the three-band cycle in a resent review for one of these "nu-metal" groups. For those who didn't read that review here is a recap.

"Music trends usually go in three waves. The glam rock trend of the late 80's is a perfect example. You started with Poison who helped launch the trend that then moved onto their followers Warrant, who did a decent job of following the leader but within a couple of years the record shelves were filled with the third wave of mediocre copycats, who are now long forgotten."

In my opinion we are now in the midst of the "third wave" for nu-metal or if you prefer, mall-core. So I thought it would be fun to see how these groups are finding success and to give some pointers to aspiring "mall-core" groups on how to succeed before the clock runs out and the next trend comes in to take mall-core's place.

Top 5 Ways to Mall-Core Success

5) Drop tune your guitars and learn four chords

4) Forget how to sing, just growl and scream into the microphone or if must sing listen to lots of Alice in Chains and Pantera and steal heavily from both.

3) Get your picture in Metal Edge Magazine

2) Come up with a goofy or cheesy name like El Nutso, Snot Rag, Wet Life Stupidity or Lump of Dirt

and the number way to Mall-Core Success.

1) Sign a record deal with Flip or Road Runner Records.