GREENMUSE is a regular reader and fan contributor at antiMUSIC, the views expressed here don't necessarily reflect those of antiMUSIC or our sponsors, but we are sure you will enjoy what he has to say!
Where are the flying cars?
Well it�s a brand spankin new year, its still covered in afterbirth its so new. So I thought I�d be real original and offer some predictions for this New Year. Come, walk with me as I gaze into the Greenmuse Mulletoid crystal powered Pabst can (patent pending). First prediction: outlook is hazy, but peering through the mists of time I can make out this; the boy band craze will die down, down not out. I envision the Backstreet Boys will fade out of public view. Nsync will continue to remain strong but after that the haze of time obscures any further visions. Prediction Two: Britney Spears will be taken as a serious artist, sort of this generations Madonna. I also see a few porno mag scandals involving pictures of her changing clothes. She possibly will do a duet with Donny Osmand but Marie Osmand will not like it and a fight will breakout with both the combatants shirts will be torn off. Videos of this skirmish will sell on the Internet for $19.95. + 4.95 shipping and handling. Prediction Three: Blink-182 and their ilk will sink back into the obscurity that bore them. Their fanbase will grow up and realize the term �take off your pants and jacket� isn�t all that funny. But I do foresee a short-lived sitcom featuring Jerry Sienfeild and Tom Delonge. For a awhile people will be fooled into thinking it�s funny but then there will be a scandal involving two dogs making out on the White House lawn which will be broadcast during the Jerry and Tom show. The dogs being much more funny will ruin them, as nobody could laugh at that show after seeing the ground breaking antics of the pups. Prediction Four: this is the final, perhaps most scary prediction, Creed will become the biggest band in the land. For this year no one will outdo them in sales, in popularity or even artistic value. They will become the band of the decade, Nirvana who? Beatles what? Make that the best band of all time! Quickies:
Woodstock 2002 will be much more peaceful than the last one because nobody will show up. Slayer will do a TV show with Billy Graham. Adam Curry will make a triumphant return to MTV, ousting Carson Daly from the heartthrob role. Adam rules! From here on out, the ball goes cloudy. Well that all for now, have a good month,
gm.
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