Here is Terrance: Based on the overwhelming successes of Repo Road Tours 1 & 2, REPO!'s director, Darren Lynn Bousman, and I, are embarking on a 3rd and final U.S. tour. This time, we're attempting to outdo ourselves: more stops, more merchandise, more guest appearances! 

But, as always, bigger plans equal bigger complications. We've spent the last 4 weeks hustling like crazy to put this�a 12-day, 11-city tour�together. I worked through both X-mass and New Years to make it happen, and Darren and I have collectively fronted a healthy sum of cash to finance the journey�far more then was needed for either of the previous Road Tours (in addition to the new travel and lodging costs of our "special guests", there are expenses for manufacturing RRT3 merch, plus required box office guarantees, so Darren and I are looking at about a $25,000 risk). So, for us, RRT3 in not only about having fun and spreading the REPO! word, but a need to recoup our financial investment. No pressure�right?

Tuesday, January 13, 2009: It's noon. I'm sitting at the Los Angeles airport preparing to board a plane to the 1st of our RRT3 stops: Salt Lake City, Utah. Already this departure feels different than the former ones. I feel uneasy. Almost depressed. Perhaps it's because I'm at the airport alone this time (due to work, DLB has opted not to attend tonight's screening). Perhaps it's because I checked our online ticket sales before boarding and saw that our advanced purchases are lower than the last tour. Perhaps it's the realization that tonight, the kick-off to the final tour, may be the beginning of the end of my active involvement with REPO!, a project that has consumed the better part of my creative energies for almost a decade.

I board the plane. It's half-full. Thankfully, I get a row to myself�a 1st for the REPO Road Tour! My spirits lift, slightly. 

It's a painless, 2-hour flight. I land in SLC a little after 3:00pm and meet up at baggage claim with REPO!'s co-creator, Darren Smith. Darren will be joining me for the 1st 2 stops of the tour. Even though I've packed for 12-days of traveling (versus Darren's 2), he's somehow managed to bring more luggage. Hmpf.

A shuttle meets us at the airport curb to take us to our hotel for the night, the Shilo Inn (yes, that's right, spelled just like the name of REPO!'s housebound heroine). My spirits brighten, a little bit more.

We arrive at our hotel, check in. The concierge tells us that the Tower Theatre is about a 45-minute walk (2.6 miles) from the hotel, so Darren and I resolve to hoof it to REPO!'s screening later tonight. When Amy Beth, the Tower Theatre's manager, gets wind of our on-foot ambitions, she tries to detour us. She attempts to seduce us with a comp'd cab ride, but we're committed to getting a little exercise, and checking out SLC's terrain.

It's 6:30 pm. We begin our hike. It's brisk but pleasant weather, and I'm surprised by the very metropolitan landscape of Salt Lake City. I guess part of me was expecting a Mormon prairie. The only thing remotely "Mormon" that we've experienced thus far is the news that SLC's Rocky Horror cast, The Latter Day Transvestites, will be in attendance tonight. I can't wait to meet them.

We arrive at the theatre around 7:30pm. Our plan was to show up with enough time to retrieve/open our REPO! merchandise boxes (which were shipped ahead of us), set up a table, and grab dinner before our 9:00pm screening. As we enter, members of SLC's REPO! Army greet us. A young couple dressed as GraveRobber (Jude "HeyJude") and Luigi (Rich "xrichlargox") lead the group. They've already set up the merch table for us, and kindly offer to assist in any way they can for the remainder of the night. Rich bequeaths me with a custom-made gift: a t-shirt featuring a bony bottom-feeding fish wearing REPO Man's helmet and the words "Night Sturgeon". My mood: completely positive.

Also waiting for us in the lobby is Kat Kellermeyer, a young woman who conducted a phone interview with me some time back for Utah's SLUG Magazine. On the phone, Kat presented herself with absolute unbiased professional decorum. In person, however, dressed as a scalpel slut of sorts, it's obvious that she is a big fan of REPO!

A line is already forming outside of the theatre, including fans dressed as Bling Mag, Shilo, GraveRobber, and RRT's usual assortment of Zydrate Addicts (replete, as always, with glowing Z-vial accessories and faux surgical scars!). Tonight, there's also a fan-made REPO! costume that I've never before seen attempted: Joan Jett from her "17" cameo, including a white Guitar Hero guitar prop.

A lovely fan near the front of the line swathed in stunning red Goth/Steampunk attire gives me a pair of gloves as a gift. She read a previous blog of mine where I bemoaned that I was a couple of mitts shy of possessing a proper winter wardrobe, so�she came tonight bearing the gift of gloves. I love REPO! fans!

Darren and I sneak across the street to a Mexican joint where we consume burritos and watered-down Coronas (imagine that: Coronas being even more watered-down!). Apparently, due to goofy religious influences in Utah, most "hard" beverages are served with a far lower alcohol percentage then normal. This fact is later spelled-out to us in vivid, melancholy detail by the Tower's staff, a fun group of alt-culture personalities who man the theatre's box office and video store�the Tower's lobby doubles as an independent DVD library. The staff also admits that because they have a Gay & Lesbian movie selection, that they are pretty much branded as heathens by UT's majority�the same majority that finds Coronas to be too strong. 

The line outside the theatre continues to grow right up until the Tower opens its doors at 8:30pm. In spite of our low pre-order stats, the theatre manages to reach an audience very near capacity. In fact, more and more people continue to show up, which delays our start time to about 9:30. 

Darren Smith and I introduce the film to the very energetic audience. They chant and cheer so loudly throughout the movie that when Darren and I escape outside, we can hear them bleeding through the theatre's walls and out onto the street.

Before our Q & A at the end of the film, the Tower's staff gives Darren and I bottles of Polygamy Porter, a beer brewed in Utah, whose slogan is " Why have just one!" We drink up, speak up, and then sign and mingle with fans until almost 3:00am. During the Q & A I am compelled to quote a few Gemini Killer lines from Exorcist III. I love that REPO! fans not only get these sort sorts of arcane horror references, but also seem to enjoy�or at least accept�my evil geekdom. 

Before heading back to our hotel to catch 2-and-a-half hours of sleep before our 6:00am wakeup call, Darren and I sign a set of ass cheeks, a pair of invisible kidney transplant scars, several breasts, and the oddest autograph request to date: a young man asks me to sign his tongue. I explain to him that Sharpee may not be the safest thing to let dissolve into your taste buds. This detours him�not at all. In fact, it inspires several additional tongue-signings before the night is over.

REPO! Road Tour Diary: Salt Lake City

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